Progress Update – as of June 4, 2016

Height: 5’7″
Current Weight: 309.4 lbs
Loss: 7.3 lbs
Current BMI: 48.5
Loss: 1.1

Bust: 52 inches
Waist: 57 inches
Loss: 1 inch
Hips: 55 inches
Loss: 1 inch

Wahoo! That is what I’m talking about. We are TEN POUNDS AWAY from the 200s people! TEN POUNDS! I don’t really look any different (yet) but who cares? That’s an accomplishment!

So, I did something the other day that I’ve been meaning to do for a long time: I renewed my gym membership! The “gym” that I’m referring to is a little different because it’s not actually a gym, it’s a recreation centre in my hometown. There are weight machines, treadmills, rowing machines, bikes, free weights, a track, a swimming pool, a skating rink, ellipticals and stair steppers, plus other equipment like resistance bands, foam rollers etc. What’s also nice about it is that this rec centre has an agreement with the other ones in the area, meaning that I can go hiking, cross-country skiing, swimming (at a different pool), ice skating or that I can utilize other gyms in the area, should I choose.

I don’t really know what I’m doing on the weight machines and I am intimidated by the other people there. However, I got one of the personal trainers who works/supervises there to give me a little tutorial of the gym and what the machines do, so I feel more comfortable. I am intimidated because everybody who was there when I was there was SO FIT. Huge muscles, people who obviously work out all the time. I just feel like a big fat slob next to those people. I know I shouldn’t, I know that I should be proud of myself for trying to better my life and that, truthfully, they’re likely not even paying attention to me at all, but I can’t help feel like they’re sitting there, laughing at that fat girl in the corner who doesn’t know what she’s doing.

But WHO CARES. I’m trying to think that way. I’m at the gym for me, to get healthy and change my life, so I really shouldn’t care.

Cheers, happy losing!

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Progress Update – as of April 23, 2016

Height: 5’7″
Current Weight: 319.9 lbs
Gain: 4.3 lbs
Current BMI: 50.1
Gain: 0.7

Well.

I’m baffled, to say the least. I went for a 30 minute walk every single day this week. I wore a pedometer. I made really good food choices.

Could I have gained muscle? It’s possible, I know that’s one reason why someone’s weight can initially go up when they start working out, but it’s not possible to gain almost 5 lbs of muscle, in a week, just by walking. I can only assume that my body just went into shock, since I’ve been sedentary for so long, and tried to hold onto the fat or something like that. Same reason why people plateau.

Anyway, I don’t know, but I’m trying not to worry about it. I was active this week and that is the most important thing.Onwards and upwards.

Cheers, happy losing!

Progress Update – as of January 30, 2016

Height: 5’7″
Current Weight: 310.6 lbs
Gain: 2.4 lbs
Current BMI: 48.6
Gain: 0.3

Sigh. I’m up again. Oh well. This week I ate out a lot, I think that’s why. I did try to make good choices, but when you eat out you usually vastly underestimate how many calories you’re consuming.

Emotionally, I’m doing okay, but it’s hard. It comes and goes and it probably will be that way for a long time, to be honest. I’m a very emotional, “heart on your sleeve” kind of person and I get very emotionally invested in the people and things that I care about. I also don’t deal very well with change.

I have a friend who has been incredible to me over the last couple of weeks, just listening and helping me sort out my feelings. She suggested to me that I get assessed for OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). People with OCD are usually portrayed in the media as germaphobes who are obsessed with order and cleanliness. Not true. It IS true that people with OCD can have compulsions such as washing their hands multiple times, but OCD is primarily an anxiety disorder which manifests itself in obsessive negative thoughts and chronic anxiety about disastrous things happen. Compulsions (such as hand washing, turning the light switch on and off multiple times) occur because they make those with OCD feel safe, they calm the anxious thoughts.

One of the symptoms of OCD is called “hyper-responsibility”, where you worry about your friends and family’s happiness to the point that it’s detrimental to your own. I always thought it was just my anxiety, but knowing that it could possibly be more than that is interesting. We will see how I go.

I realized that I totally forgot to post the update of my goals last week, so here goes:

Weekly Goal #1: Get 150 minutes of exercise a week. Update: Haven’t done this, not even close. However, it’s been absolutely beautiful out where I live, so I thought that I would go for a walk at lunch. Hopefully that will also help lighten my mood.
Weekly Goal #2: Eat breakfast every morning. Update: I’ve done really well with this so far, actually. Most mornings I have at least had a smoothie, so yay for me!
Weekly Goal #3: Daily dry brushing (twice daily). If you don’t know what dry brushing is, it’s using a dry body brush on your body to exfoliate your skin. It’s supposed to stimulate circulation, stimulate the lymphatic system, reduce cellulite and eliminate toxins. I don’t really believe that any of that is true, but it feels nice and it makes my skin really soft. Update: I haven’t done it twice daily, but I’ve done it most days. It hasn’t done anything for my cellulite and I doubt that it will, but exfoliating is good, so who cares?
Weekly Goal #4: Drink 2L of water very day. Update: Well, I don’t think I ever drank 2L and I didn’t do it every day, but I did drink more water than normal this week and I tried to choose water over other choices.

Weekly Goal #5: Get 8 hours of sleep a night. We will see how I do!

Cheers, happy losing!

Progress Update – as of December 26, 2015

Height: 5’7″
Current Weight: 308.9 lbs
Loss: 1.2 lbs
Current BMI: 48.4
Loss: 0.2

Last weigh-in of 2015, wahoo! Here’s to a great 2016!

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas, I certainly did! I’m honestly very surprised that I lost anything this past week, given all of the mashed potatoes, turkey, stuffing, chocolate, sparkling apple juice (so good!) and pavlova (a traditional New Zealand meringue dish, served with whip cream and fruit) that I consumed. Not going to lie, I did not eat very well at all. I’m assuming it’s water weight, because I didn’t exercise at all either. Ah well, down is better than up!

It’s the time to make New Year’s Resolutions once again. I always make a million of these, but I rarely stick to them. I think my problem is that I try to start them all at the same time – less sugar, more water, daily exercise, more sleep, more green tea, daily yoga – and I overwhelm myself. So this year, instead, I’m going to try to do one new thing a week. Week 1, maybe I’ll try to get in 150 minutes of exercise over the course of the week. Week 2, maybe I’ll drink more water. And so forth!

I’m planning to list these weekly goals on each of my posts, so I can keep myself accountable and can update you all on my progress!

Cheers, Happy New Year!

Progress Update – as of August 2, 2014

Height: 5’7″
Current Weight: 292.2
Gain: 1.9 lbs
Current BMI: 45.8
Gain: 0.3

I almost put “current height”. As if my height fluctuates these days. Haha.

I have also switched my weigh-in day to Saturday, as that is now the day that I attend my Weight Watchers meetings. (Didn’t I say it would change?) It might change again, but for now Saturday is easier for me with my work schedule.

I gained again this week. BUT I think it’s possible that it’s water retention. I have significantly increased my exercise in the past couple of weeks and this past week I was noticing that I felt really dizzy a lot of the time, even when I was sitting down. It seems to have gone away (but of course I’ll watch it to ensure it isn’t a symptom of something more sinister) but I think that I probably wasn’t increasing my water intake to match my exercise. And, as you probably all know, not drinking water can actually cause you to “gain” weight – or at least the number on the scale increases – because your body holds onto the water you do have to try and retain it.

I am hoping that’s what it is. However, I need to get better control of my eating. Exercise has never been a problem for me. I mean, I definitely haven’t done it regularly since I was a kid (excepting the last few months, of course) but I’ve never been someone who hates sports and exercise. I love to dance, swim, bike, rollerblade, horseback ride, run, ski, skate, and play soccer, basketball, volleyball, teenis etc. However, because I have lost flexibility and am carrying more weight, I have found that doing some of these activities (particularly those involving jumping) put a lot more pressure on my joints than they used to and, as a result, I am very prone to injury. (For example, in the past 10 years I have  sprained both ankles several times each, sprained my wrist, crushed my meniscus [a little disk in your knee], sprained toes and broken off a piece of my ankle bone (twice!). Gross.)

So, long story short, I love exercise. But my main problem is, and always has been, eating. I find that when I exercise I sometimes give myself too much of a free pass with my eating. For example, I’ll think “Oh, I can have this donut because I went for a bike ride today”. And while I strongly believe that it’s important to indulge once in awhile, I give myself too much freedom to indulge and thus, fall into a “one step forward, two steps back” kind of pattern. So, I’ve got the exercise thing down (and I’m really enjoying myself!) but it’s time to really focus on the eating.

What I Did Well This Week:
1) Well, I have been exercising almost every day. I used to go about exercise quite the wrong way. I would do the same routine every single day and I think half the reason that I would often fall off that wagon is because I got bored. This time around, I am trying new things. I have been swimming a lot lately, something I love, and I have been riding my bike, something I haven’t done in ages. (Although, to be honest, it is getting a little uncomfortable. I tend to carry the majority of my weight in my mid-section and I actually have a really bony butt for being a big gal, so riding for too long gets a bit uncomfortable!) I dusted off my old rollerblades (although I haven’t used them yet, oops) and I got myself a pair of walking poles so that I can do Nordic walking (similar to cross-country skiing, but walking, but you use the poles to push yourself along and walk your arms). In short, I am enjoying the summer weather immensely (it’s going by far too quickly!!!) and exercising as much as possible outside, enjoying the fresh air.

What I Can Improve On:
1) Eating better, as I said previously, is my main priority. I just need to make smarter choices and to allow myself to indulge less than I’m doing now. I’m trying to cut back on sugar in general, since I eat way too much of it, but I’m finding it very, very difficult. That stuff is addictive. However, one little bit at a time and I will get there.
2) I also need to get more sleep. I average about 6 hours a night. For some people that is probably plenty, but for me it’s just not. I feel really tired a lot of time and the fact that my job is basically completely sedentary doesn’t help my fatigue. The big thing for me is to turn off the screens. I don’t really watch TV (uh, well, except Netflix) but I am a sucker for the internet (Buzzfeed articles, anyone? Addictive.) and so I spend far too much time on here, often at the expense of my sleep. So I’m trying to cut down on my screen time, especially before bed, and do something else like read a book.

How I Feel:
Positive, in general. I am discouraged about the numbers on the scale, but at least I know where it’s coming from, it’s not as though I’ve been perfect and am not seeing any progress. I know that I am making really good steps with my exercise and I know where I have to go from here.

Cheers, happy losing!

(Also, I have just finished Breaking Bad [oh man, so good] and now I’ve moved onto Orange is the New Black and I’m obsessed. Anyone else?)

Progress Update – as of July 17, 2014 and July 24, 2014

Height: 5’7″

July 17:
Current Weight: 287.8 lbs
Loss: 1.4 lbs
Current BMI: 45.1
Loss: 0.2

July 24:
Current Weight: 290.3 lbs
Gain: 2.5 lbs
Current BMI: 45.5
Gain: 0.4

Ugh. So. Another gain. Not going to lie, I am feeling frustrated. I’m not really that surprised though, I have been having a really difficult time juggling work and exercise, as I’m always exhausted when I get home from work and I haven’t yet been able to get up early enough in the morning to fit in a workout before I have to leave. When my exercise routine goes kaput, I sometimes find that my eating follows suit. I am trying very hard to keep going and not just throw in the towel like I have done in the past, but it’s hard. Anyway…

What I Did Well This Week:
1) Uh, not a lot. Everything kind of went cuckoo – not enough sleep, eating less fruits and veggies, not exercising. Just an all around bad week.

What I Can Improve On:
1) Everything. Getting more sleep, eating better, exercising more. All of it. That’s the plan this week.

How I Feel:
Discouraged, but not ready to quit. I know that I just need to keep putting one foot forward. I think that I need to just start thinking of things in shorter terms, just taking it for one day at a time. The idea of exercising everyday and eating really well forever can be really daunting, but I am going to try to think of it in shorter terms. Just for today, I can.

Also, I have started swimming with one of my best friends, Moog (check out her blog mamamoogie.wordpress.com) and I sincerely hope that this can be a weekly occurence. We have done it 3 times now and we’re really hoping to make it a weekly habit. I usually workout by myself, but I am finding that I really enjoy having company, it’s been really nice.

Cheers and happy losing!

Progress Update – as of May 19, 2014

Once again, I did not have access to a scale this week, nor will I next week. I am staying at someone’s house at the moment, actually, but their scale is broken, so oh well. 

What I Did Well This Week:

1) Well, I have been eating fairly well. Lots of fish and veggies and chicken and the like, not junk food. (For the main meal at least, but we’ll touch on that later…)
2) I have been drinking a lot of tea, simply because the people that I’m staying with drink a lot of tea. We’re talking like 5 cups a day, easy. Which is good, because I definitely do not drink enough water. Tea has caffeine, yes, but I have been having it without sugar and milk, so essentially it is like drinking water. 

What I Can Improve On:

1) I went a little chocolate-crazy this week. I think it’s because I stayed at a cabin for 4 days with no internet and I was bored. Isn’t that pathetic? It made me realize how much I use the internet and how short my attention span is. So I’m thinking that I should rein that in. Not only is sitting on my computer a lot bad for me, but apparently, when I don’t have access to it, I replace that bad habit with eating sugar, another dreadful habit. So I think cutting down on screen time and going for a walk instead would benefit me in a lot of ways. 

How I Feel:

Pretty good, for the most part. I have no idea where I am on the scale, but when I measured myself last week, I had last several inches (although, to be honest, I don’t know if my measuring is very accurate). I am going by pants size more. I think I might be down to a size 16 by now. I brought two pairs of jeans with me: a 20 and an 18. The 20 is way too big, even with a belt and the 18 is getting to that point now. So yay?

I am coming HOME in a couple of weeks, at least for the summer, and then I am planning to embark on a “clean eating” challenge meaning no refined sugar, no processed foods, lots of lean protein and whole grains etc. etc. It will be hard, because I am a sugar addict and I know it, but I really want to do it. 

Until next time, au revoir!